Stability, Systems & Giving Myself Grace
- Shelby Davis
- Jun 19
- 3 min read
Alright, here’s the truth:I’ve been a mom for almost three years, a wife even longer, and I just now feel like I’m finally getting my life together. Like... last week.
And let’s be real—I know life won’t always feel this stable. There will be seasons of chaos again. But at least now, I know how to ground myself when things get messy.
That’s why my word for 2025 is stability.Not perfection.Not control.Just a solid foundation I can keep coming back to.
And for the first time, I’m not just hoping for it—I’m committing to it.I’m making intentional changes, shifting my mindset, and actually building routines that support the life I want. But more than anything, I’m trusting God to guide me.
Because the truth is, I didn’t figure this out on my own.
Every breakthrough, every lesson, every moment of clarity—it wasn’t me.It was God. Showing me the way. Reminding me that I don’t have to do this in my own strength. That even in the moments when I felt lost, overwhelmed, or straight-up failing—He was there. Holding me up.
For so long, I was trying to be “organized”… but in the most disorganized way possible.
I had five different systems, multiple planners, sticky notes everywhere. Instead of feeling put together, I felt like I was constantly behind. Constantly stressed. Constantly trying to “catch up” but never actually getting there.
And on top of that, I was drowning in responsibilities—not just as a mom, but as a wife, as someone trying to contribute financially, and as a woman with dreams outside of motherhood. But between the house, the kids, the endless to-do lists… I had no time for myself.
Let me be clear: my kids are NOT a burden. They are my greatest blessing.But I couldn’t pour into them the way I wanted to if I was constantly running on empty.
So I had to make real changes.
First, I stopped using every organizing tool and stuck with what actually works:
Google Calendar – for scheduling (because if it’s not on the calendar, it’s not happening).
Asana – for tracking my tasks so I don’t rely on memory alone.
ChatGPT – for brainstorming when my mom brain is fried.
(I tried Motion too, but let’s be real—it did nothing for me. 😅)
And the biggest change?I invested in help. I hired a nanny.
And honestly? That decision wasn’t easy. I had to fight for it. I had to advocate for myself. I had to push past the guilt and admit that I couldn’t do it all alone.
But now? Having those extra hours back is life-changing.It’s allowing me to pursue my goals, contribute financially, and—most importantly—be a better, more present mom and wife.
But the most powerful shift? My mindset.
I used to say things like:“I can’t work out—I don’t have time.”“I can’t read—I’m too busy.”“I can’t take care of myself—there’s too much to do.”
Now? I ask myself: “What CAN I do?”
I might not make it to the gym, but I CAN do a GrowWithJo workout in my living room (yes, in a cute matching set—because why not?).
I might not have time to sit with a book, but I CAN listen to an audiobook while cleaning or driving (because multitasking is a mom superpower).
I might not have hours of free time, but I CAN take small steps every day toward the life I want.
And above all—I CAN lean on God.
Because when I try to do it all in my own strength, I burn out.But when I surrender it to Him, I find peace. I find clarity.I find stability—not in my own plans, but in His.
Let’s be real—life’s not magically “fixed” now.
There will be seasons where I feel on top of everything.And seasons where I feel like I’m drowning again.
That’s just life.
But now I have something I didn’t before: a foundation.Something to return to when things feel out of control.
Because for me, stability isn’t about perfection.It’s about knowing I can take care of myself so I can take care of everything else.
But more importantly?It’s about knowing that God is taking care of me.
So if you’re in that messy middle, trying to figure it out—give yourself grace.You’re learning. You’re adjusting.
And one day, you’ll look up and realize:Oh wait… I think I’ve got this.
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