I Wanted a Soft Life—But I Had to Build It First

Let’s be honest.I wanted the soft life.I wanted peace.I wanted margin.I wanted slow mornings with coffee and clarity—not chaos and crumbs.

And I still want that.But I’ve realized something that’s changed everything:

The soft life isn’t just something you get.It’s something you build.

And let me tell you—I’m still building.

What I Thought the Soft Life Would Be

I used to scroll past those dreamy morning routines on Pinterest or TikTok—the ones with clean counters, perfectly poured matcha, worship music in the background, and a woman who somehow looked rested and radiant before 9 AM.

I thought: “Yes. That’s the vibe. That’s what I need.”

I pictured a life where things felt light. Where I didn’t have to hustle so hard. Where my nervous system wasn’t always fried.But what I didn’t realize was...you don’t stumble into that kind of peace.You build it—with prayer, with boundaries, with hard decisions, and with consistency that nobody sees.

What It’s Actually Taken

You know what the soft life has required so far?

• Saying no when I used to say yes out of guilt

• Hiring help—even when I felt bad for needing it

• Letting go of what looks productive and choosing what’s actually peaceful

• Reworking routines again and again until they fit my life—not some Pinterest board

• Being honest about what I need instead of pretending I’m fine

• Choosing grace when I don’t “get it all done”

• And most importantly, surrendering the pressure to God daily

Let’s be clear—I’m not in some luxurious season right now.I’m in the foundation phase.Laying bricks.Decluttering distractions.Learning how to ask for help and receive rest without guilt.

It’s Not Aesthetic—It’s Alignment

I think we confuse “soft” with “pretty.”But this season has shown me softness is not about aesthetic.It’s about alignment.

• Aligned with your values

• Aligned with your priorities

• Aligned with the pace God is actually calling you to walk—not the one the world is pressuring you to run

Some days that looks like slow mornings. Other days it looks like surviving off grace and dry shampoo. Either way, I’m learning not to judge the season—I’m learning to honor it.

If You’re Still Building Too…

Sis, you are not doing it wrong.If your “soft life” still feels hard, that doesn’t mean it’s not coming.It just means you’re still pouring the foundation.

And foundations are sacred.

You’re not behind.You’re not lazy.You’re not asking for too much.You’re doing the brave work of breaking cycles and choosing peace—even when it’s not convenient.

Final Thought:

I still want the soft life.But now I know it won’t fall into my lap.

I’ll keep showing up for it,Keep surrendering the hustle,Keep choosing systems that support—not drain—me,And keep trusting the God who promises rest for the weary.

Because yes, the soft life is real.But you will have to build it—with boundaries, with belief, and with bold obedience.

And honestly?It’s worth it.