Allowing Yourself To Shine

Are you dimming your light, talents, and skills ?

Tbh I’ve always been shy about being the it girl or fully grasped the it girl mentality like I know that I’m beautiful and nice and all that stuff but I never embrace the side of like being TRULY & confidently myself till now.

The reason I bring this up is because just recently I did a writing exercise. It is called 100 memories and what I did was wrote down 100 memories or moments that I remember from childhood all the way up until now. The purpose of this exercise was to find some central themes in my life that I could reveal to myself & talk to you about. One of the themes I realized about myself was that I was not confident in myself because I listened more to what others around me told me I was good at rather than actually determining or encouraging myself.

Which is probably why I struggled to find my major in college, and also my purpose after school. It was also a combination of being interested in a bunch of topics or fields of work which is why I graduated with a degree in interdisciplinary studies (which is combining two or more fields of studies).

My parents always have supported me and told me I was capable of anything I put my mind too but at the time, I was more focused on trying to find a career that would make them proud to show me off & what would make money. Which they never asked of me but I just felt like I needed to reach these expectations at the time. As I’m growing into myself and realizing my passions for creativity, fashion, social media, and influencing, I was pushed further away from the idea of becoming a lawyer or doctor or anything deemed an “impressive“ career and I couldn’t be more satisfied into artistry and amazing thing is, my family is here for it too !

A big part of me coming to embrace myself and passions is God providing me with people that support me being authentic instead of something I’m not & call me out on it too. Also, I was blessed with a husband that fully supports everything I do & accepts me for me. Which in turn, helped me to learn to do that for myself. I realize before I was hiding myself to make others comfortable or satisfied and scared to see who I truly am regardless of acceptance.

Whether my husband knew it or not at the time, Robert encouraged me to achieve my dreams when he achieved his, he played over seas basketball, even when people told him to get a more stable job or that it was super hard, he made it happen on his own, he worked hard everyday and did it and it was so inspiring. I also happened to see he reached out to models and influencers on his own to ask them to mentor me, and it meant the world that he believed in me like that, more than I did myself.

Enough about me though, if you’re reading this there is probably many reasons you can say why you haven’t truly stepped into your purpose, I’ll name a few, it could be your passion doesn’t make a lot of money, you may have people around you who only supports your passions if they reflect well on them, or your family or friends or whoever tell you that you should keep your secure job and sometimes it may just be you telling yourself that you can’t do it, but the matter of fact is YOU CAN & WILL.

To keep it short, here’s what I suggest you do in list form cause that’s what you’re here for lol.

1. Remove yourself or take a step back from people that don’t believe in what you believe in yourself for. Or let them know you don’t want their opinion anymore on YOUR life.

2. Evaluate and write down what you truly want for yourself whether that be a career, a purpose, a lifestyle change, a partner. EVERYTHING

3. If you have the time, do the 100 moments exercise and figure out the reoccurring themes in your life. Then, evaluate the good and bad things/ affirmations you’ve been telling yourself and adjust your affirmations accordingly to change your perspective and encourage yourself.

4. Dive head first into whatever it may be that you want to pursue. For me, it’s content creation, influencing, fashion, artistry. So, I created a fashion stylist page and post fashion inspo daily, I’m posting this blog & recording a podcast and I record simple everyday content for my influencing page, and I’m surrounding myself with other creatives. So do whatever that is for you, don’t wait for the ”right time” cause you’ll be waiting forever.

5. Be gentle with yourself and learn as you grow.

You got this !